“باور نمی‌کنم که این اتفاق افتاده است”

“I can’t believe this happened.”
Mohammad Mohabbai

The institution and legal rights of dowry have roots in cultures and traditions of the Semitic people, especially Judaism. This institution was not transferred to Christianity, as the spread of Christianity took place in the Eastern Roman Empire (Byzantium), which had fundamental cultural differences with the Semitic and Jewish cultures and the Mesopotamian region. However, dowry was adopted by Islam and its concept and scope were expanded. Dowry is a monetary amount that a man gives to a woman at the time of marriage contract or commits to pay.

Contrary to the common belief that, based on the literal meaning of “mahr” (synonymous with dowry), this property is given in exchange for showing honesty, love, and friendship, in Islamic jurisprudence, mahr has a different meaning. In the jurisprudence of the seven Islamic sects (Imami, Zaidi, Ibadi, Shafi’i, Hanbali, Hanafi, and Maliki), mahr is given in the context of “tafweedh boz'” in marriage. Those familiar with jurisprudential literature understand the meaning of “tafweedh boz'” very well, which has a completely sexual connotation, not a legal one. In this way, when a man enters into a marriage contract and accepts the marriage proposal (the offer of marriage to the woman), by paying the mahr amount or committing to pay it, he actually gains the “right of enjoyment” and the right to benefit from the

In the legal discussions of Islamic schools, “mahr” is essentially the cost of the first use of a woman’s sexual organ by a free woman. The sexual organ of a non-free or slave woman (referred to as a “concubine” in old terminology) has no value and the right to use it belongs to the slave owner or the master of that woman.

These customs belong to the pre-modern world; a world where the concept of “humanity” as a citizen with natural and contractual rights, and the concept of “human” as an independent subject and “agent” had no meaning. Dowry and these strange and bizarre financial and sexual customs also belong to that world and have no relevance in the current modern world where relationships, contracts, and obligations must be based on equal rights and responsibilities. However, it still exists in the laws of Islamic countries, including Iran, and has defenders among various groups for different reasons. But is this defense logical? What quality does dowry have that it is defended in this modern world where relationships and contracts must be based on equal rights and obligations? The only reason some reformist forces, including some feminists, defend dowry is that it is a tool of pressure on men to make them stay in a marriage and prevent them from betraying or abandoning their spouse for no reason. On the other hand, the

On the other hand, in recent decades, heavy dowries have become an epidemic and men, either out of love or ignorance or recklessness, give in to these heavy dowries; while sometimes they do not have the ability to pay such large amounts and women, in order to collect some of these dowries, cause some men to end up in prison. However, prison is a “punishment”. “Punishment” is only for “crime”, not for the inability to fulfill a financial commitment. In modern law, and based on international human rights conventions, punishing and imprisoning citizens for financial obligations is against human rights. Therefore, the forces of change that criticize some legal restrictions on women, including the right to divorce, the right to leave the country, etc. (which are also against human rights), should also criticize the imprisonment of men for not paying dowries.

It seems that a fundamental change in the laws related to the institution of family and marriage is necessary in Iran. Equal rights and responsibilities for men and women in marriage, and the formation of a prenuptial agreement between the husband and wife before starting a life together, can be examples of this change. Of course, equal job opportunities in society and financial transparency in the country’s economic system are necessary for this transformation. Currently, many aspects of this change are available, and the main obstacle is the legal system of the Islamic Republic, which is based on jurisprudence and has preserved traditional relationships with rigidity. However, even within this legal system, women can refrain from using traditional dowry practices (which are not only outdated but also unethical in today’s world) by obtaining a “divorce proxy” and commitments such as “the right to choose a residence” and “the right to custody of children.”